It must have evolved from an earlier time of criminal activity and snitches. There was the constant responsibility of carrying a gun. A big gun (I wore a military-issue .45 automatic). And I should mention here that in the three years I carried the gun on my side(it was legal in Arizona), I never once fired it in anger. Not once. The mere presence of a weapon in your possession, especially as one as powerful as a .45(you could stop a car with the right ammunition), could usually avert any notion of foul play that might arise. It wasn’t so much the fear of interacting with your ‘superiors’, that is, the persons who supplied you, although that was also a consideration. It was the simple fact that you carried large sums of money on you. Many people, including some of your ‘loyal’ customers, considered the possibility of liberating you of, say, ten thousand dollars, with one blow to the back of the head, to be another sad fact of ‘life in the big city’. So much for honor. And there’s. You’ve done it before. Why would anything be different now? They are both here for you. Tell them.“Sir, ma’am … nothing has changed … no, of course things have changed but not what a truly desire.” I search each of their faces. Slight smiles have formed on them and I catch Mrs. Baldwin flick her eyes to her husband and quickly back to me. Mr. Baldwin is fully concentrated on me. I hadn’t yet said what needed to be said. “Sir, ma’am, yes, things have changed in my life. Things that will need to be addressed and resolved … and soon. But there is a big part of me, what is inside me, the most powerful desire and need within me that directly affects my feeling of fulfillment that has not changed. You have shown me that I am submissive and I have accepted that. More, I have embraced it, I think.” I look him in the eyes. “Sir, I still want to be your submissive.” I turn my focus to her. “Ma’am, I still want to be your submissive.” My eyes flick back and forth between them as I continue. “I.
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